First the best news - Bertie is much, much better. His temperature is back to normal and he looks much brighter and happier. He even thought that he wasn't going to be caught tonight and trotted off around the field, which was great to see if slightly trying as I was going out and running late as usual!!!!
Kate has shaken off her high temperature and just has a slight cough at the moment, and so far the others all seem fine so I am hoping for the best now.
I was rushing to go out tonight as I was going to a Goat Society meeting. The talk was on Permaculture and I have come away feeling inspired and at peace with myself for the first time in ages.
I chatted to the person giving the talk afterwards and it turned out that I have met her mother as she breeds Dales Ponies and hers are closely related to Bella and Jack.
Her daughter is a lovely girl and gave me loads to think about. I think she may have just given me the sense of direction I've been searching for.
Permaculture brings together all the diverse threads I've been playing with and musing over. It's all about sustainable living, working with nature in an easy, harmonious way, making the most of what you have and being true to yourself and your ideals.
It's all about positive thinking and positive energy, creativity, and about community and giving back, to other people and to the earth.
Friends have told me that I have been spreading myself too thin and I should concentrate on one thing at a time. I can't do that. I've spent my whole working life obsessed with horses and all things equine and there are SO many other things that I want to learn about and to do. That's what permaculture is all about.
It seems to me that it all fits in perfectly with clicker training, positive thinking and using all of your assets and talents to the full. The ethos is also all about taking your time and assessing your priorities and needs. This strangles outbreak is forcing me to do that which can only be good. I have been rushing around like a headless chicken trying to live life to the full when I don't even know what I want from life anymore.
I have never been able to do anything just for the sake of it. For me there has always had to be a purpose and a reason. All my former dreams seem meaningless since David died and I haven't found any new, lasting dreams to dream yet, but I think that permaculture will be at the heart of them.
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