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Friday 8 January 2010

Dreams, Heroes and Dragons.

This is my new blog for the new decade and my new life - nearly unrecognisable from my life this time last year but now assuming some sort of normality and familiarity at long last.

Life is good and fulfilling but I still have some dragons left to slay. I have been looking for someone to slay them for me but have finally realised the truth - that I can only slay them for myself. I do have heroes aplenty to help me though, through their friendship and inspiration, and my gratitude to them is endless and timeless.

My two main heroes are my friends, Peter and Michael, without whose care, work, help and constant, dependable friendship I might not be here at all. They were there when I thought life had nothing left to offer me, and they are here still, and I can never, ever repay them for all their kindness.

Then there are all my other friends, old and new - heroes and heroines every one of them, and my animals who have uncomplainingly put up with so much change. Life has changed as much for them as it has for me but they have made far less fuss about it than I have!

The Devil's Horsemen and Jive Pony, especially the lovely Rosie, are also heroes of mine, inspiring me to try new things and aim much higher with my horses. They raise my spirits and my standards every time I see them.

I have recently found a new hero and friend who has shown me that soul mates are still out there to be found. I hope that he will stay a lifelong friend and confidant, and I am so grateful to him for his understanding and compassion, humour, wisdom and inspiration, his wonderful voice and poetic writing, and for my beautiful owl.

My dragons are all in my head but no less real for that - feelings of inadequacy and inability to manage on my own, and what was the almost constant ache that some part of me is missing. They are all receding now, along with the fear and lack of any sense of normality that accompanied such radical, unwanted change.

Ten months on I am now happy and confident for most of the time. I have proven to myself that I am very adaptable and a very fast learner, and in control of myself.

This blog will be about my quest for more heroes to learn from and be inspired by, along with enjoying life and learning from the heroes I already have.

It will, very importantly, also be about developing and following my dreams which all involve my friends and my horses, dogs, cattle and other animals.

Lets make 2010 the year that it all began - that dreams started to become clear and real - for all of us.

10 comments:

  1. Hurrah for you, Helen. Honesty is the best policy and you will find so many supporting you and wishing you the best. Does this mean you are dropping "New Beginnings"?

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  2. An internet friend who is an animal behaviourist has contacted me (among others!) about an internet magazine that she wants to start. I've suggested to her that you may perhaps be interested and may be someone who could write the occasional article as you (like her) are very much into clicker/+R and you obviously enjoy writing. I'd like to put you in touch with her. Perhaps you could contact me by email rosetrailers@yahoo.co.uk
    Liz

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  3. Nice idea for a new blog. I'll enjoy stopping by to see how things are going.

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  4. Congratulations on your new blog, Helen!

    If you are out on dragonhunts, I suppose we will be like the Knights of the Round Table, cheering you along, lol!

    You go, girl - you have made a fantastic hunting season in 2009. I wish you all the best for the new year and decade, and will follow your adventures here, be sure!

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  5. You are all so lovely - thank you all so very, very much!!!!

    Funnily enough, HorseOfCourse, some of my long term ideas do involve the Arthurian and Knights of the Round Table theme.

    freightrose, I will email you tonight. Thank you very much.

    Phaedra96, yes, I think New Beginnings has run it's course and it's time to move on.

    Thank you all for coming along with me. With friends like all of you there is no need for any of us to be frightened of dragons, is there?

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  6. What a lovely first post Helen - I LOVE the pics. I think 2010 will be an exciting year for you and its so lovely that you allow us to follow you here and enjoy your journey.

    Come the better weather it would be lovely to catch up and see your lovely farm again. You never know, I might bring Loly and Tig with me!!

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  7. Oh wow, Charlotte, it would be fantastic to see you again!!! And I would love to meet Loly and Tig at long last.

    Why not bring them for the weekend and we'll get Hilary down for the weekend too!!!!

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  8. Being a bit thick the link I left on New Beginnings was to this page of this blog rather than the main page.

    I only mention this incase anyone else is as dim as me and keeps just getting back to this page!!!

    I have now altered the link. You would think that I'd been on Blogger long enough by now, wouldn't you?!!!!!!

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  9. Lovely new start Helen.

    Your comment re dragons reminded me of the film I was watching last night - The Chronicles of Narnia. when Aslan held everyone back , so Peter could slay his first "dragon".

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I am a clicker training addict and there is no cure - thank goodness!!!